God gave us emotions to express our self and the mood
we are experiencing at any given moment. They are an important part of our
soul, which includes our intellect, emotions and choices. Each emotion has many
variations of intensity and nuances of feeling, such as annoyed, angry and
enraged. We often think that we are too vulnerable when we express our true
feelings, so we hide behind masks, which help us to pretend.
We suppress our feelings in an attempt to be patient
and to get along with people, trying not to nag or to complain. Once our
patience runs out, however, this usually compounds the problem due to a rise in
the intensity of our feelings. Prior to the point of frustration and anger, it
helps if we will calmly express how someone’s negative behavior or words are
affecting us and making us feel. No one is perfect, and we all have value and
worth.
As we take frequent stock of our emotions, we get a
clue as to how we are really doing in that moment of time. If we are not being
treated properly, our emotions give us a clue that this abusive behavior is not
acceptable. Our underlying thoughts fuel our behavior. We simply need to get
alone and take the time to journal or to think, in order to get in touch with
how we really feel at the core of our soul.
Sometimes, following the road map that emotions give
us leads us back to the disturbing incidents in our past, which still affect us
today. Then, once we understand the cause of our emotions, it is much easier to
explain to others how we really feel. Their offensive behavior may be just a
misunderstanding, or a lack of discernment or manners on the part of the other
person. That is why relationships work out better if we express how we really
feel before our soul hides behind a mask.
If the other person sees no problem with their words
or behavior, or if they consistently disregard our needs, we can erect
boundaries to protect our soul from their painful words and behavior. Putting
distance between them and us, or changing our focus about how their actions,
opinions or beliefs affect us, will ensure that our heart is not constantly
bombarded by their insensitivity and callous behavior.
Prayer:
Father God, help us to choose our words carefully and
to speak up when we are violated by another person’s words or actions. Help us
to change our focus about their behavior, so that we can maintain the
relationship without severing the unity between us. When the whole world
misunderstands or criticizes us, You are holding out Your arms, ready to pour
out Your love and grace on us in our time of need. We can unburden our heart to
You, sharing with You our deepest feelings without any fear of censure or
ridicule.
We can pay attention the red flags that our negative
emotions give us and use our words to express how we really feel before we let
our emotions dictate our behavior.
