Grateful for the Bumps in the Road

Our friend Bernadette should have died before reaching the age of 8, because of a debilitating disease. When I met her, she just celebrated her 43rd birthday. She uses an electric wheel chair to get around, but lives a very full life with her husband as missionaries.

She had another miracle happen too. While crossing a street a few years ago, her wheel chair hit a bump in the road. This delayed her a few seconds, which ended up sparing her from serious injury or possibly even death. A car ran a red light and she came within inches of being hit.

In the past, I used to grumble when things did not go as I planned. I had not yet learned to consult God or to consider the bumps in my road as joyous occasions (Philippians 4:4-8). I soon learned, however, that God really does work out all things for my good (Romans 8:28).

I started writing a list every single night of five aspects of my life for which I am grateful - even the negative issues. I meditated on my list the next day as I praised God for His constant provision and protection over me and my family (Philippians 4:8).

This habit saved me from the negative spiral that Satan previously caused in my soul, by prompting my melancholy personality to focus on the negative. Now, prayer and praise of our Creator and Lord is a perpetual habit in which I partake every moment of the day.

When I read Psalm 91, I am assured that God will care for me through every trial. He keeps us through all harm, and watches over our life (Psalm 121:7). Hiding under the shadow of His wings is my favorite place to abide.

Bernadette’s experience gave me a refresher course. Now, I always view those pesky bumps in the road as blessings from God, instead of impediments; with seeds for a miracle hidden in every issue I experience - good and bad.

Prayer:

Lord Jesus, help me to see with the eyes of Your Spirit and to grow in gratitude for all You do for me, in me and through me. Our intimacy with You is unmatched by any human relationship we can ever experience. Thank you for Your presence in our life. I may never know how You used the bumps in my road to save me from utter destruction, but I will praise You for them anyway.

Apart from You, we can do nothing (John 15:5). We abide in You and bear much fruit for Your glory (John 15:8). Your Holy Spirit directs us and confirms Your truth to us through our knowledge of Your Word, which fills our heart and directs our mind. We want to live in the center of Your will for each moment of our days.

Thought for the Day:

Having Christ in our life tilts the scales in our favor; regardless of the negative aspects we experience in a day, there is always something God provides, protects us from, and plans for us, for which we can praise Him.

Light and Momentary Affliction

Some of us have multiple degrees, rise to administrative positions in our career, own our own company, make partner, turn our meager savings into a substantial nest egg, etc.; and we feel that we achieved the status we coveted and have now arrived at success.

The Apostle Paul achieved success in his life as well; but once he experienced God on the road to Damascus, he realized that all of his accomplishments were inconsequential when compared to the glory of Christ living within him, even through all of Paul's sufferings.

He endured so much persecution in his Christian life, but he considered it irrelevant when compare to his intimate relationship with Christ, the power of His resurrection working in him, and the transformation of his spirit, soul, and eventually his body (Philippians 3:7-10).

He gained, and shared with us, so much wisdom through what he suffered. His greatest advice was that we can be joyful in persecution (Philippians 3:2). He realized what the Prophet Jeremiah proclaimed (29:11): that God's plans for us are to bless us.

Even when life seems to win by overwhelming us with circumstances that crush us under their blow, we are to rejoice. The first effect of joy is to change our mindset. We stop focusing on the trials, and give the issues to the Lord to change them.

Joy also strengthens our soul, and builds up our hope and faith in God's faithfulness. It gets our mind off the issues causing our distress and puts it squarely on God, which is where it belongs (Isaiah 26:3). Praising and reading God's Word also bring us joy.

Trials produce patience in us, and patience perfects us (James 1:4-8). Patience teaches us to see the big picture of God's love and abundance, rather than our finite circumstances. Patience reminds us that, if we need something, God will provide for us in His way and time.

Prayer:

Father God, You shroud us with Your mercy and bless us with Your immense grace (2 Corinthians 12:8-10) to traverse any trial we could ever experience on this earth. As we learn to walk in Your Spirit, we stop experiencing trials produced by our own choices, so that the issues that do come our way are designed by You to make us more like Jesus.

You promise the crown of life to those who patiently endure the trials of this life with faith in You (James 1:12-15). You also help us to see that rarely do we ever suffer the extreme issues that Jesus faced in His lifetime, and during His crucifixion. Remind us that Christ abides within us by Your Holy Spirit, and there is nothing too difficult for You, or for us with Christ in us (Luke 18:27; Philippians 4:13-16; Colossians 1:27).

Thought for the Day:

When we traverse a steep mountain of trials, carrying a heavy burden, we change our focus to the deep, intense joy from within that God provides for us, in spite of our circumstances; this helps us to have His strength as we attain a goal, overcome an obstacle, or hope for a more secure future, even though we have not received it yet. - Nehemiah 8:10

A Good Marriage - Enjoying the Simple Pleasures

Marriage is not a cure-all, a panacea for all of our ills in life. We are servants of one another, and together of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, marriage is about give and take, not a vehicle to fulfill all of our needs and expectations.

There are basic characteristics of a good marriage: unconditional love, companionship, fun times, shared memories, complimentary ministries, help to traverse trials, etc. Choosing a mate wisely is highly recommended.

There are several TV shows, movies and media sites out today that picture the truth about many marriages: "Desperate Housewives", "Lonely, but Married", etc.

We enjoy our mate, accept his/her personality as it is, support their vision and goals for their life, and realize that we are all human with faults and foibles of our own. However, some of our mate's decisions or dreams may dishearten us.

At times, we feel left-out, neglected, over-looked and disappointed. Marriage is not supposed to make us happy. Instead, we find our joy in our relationship and service to our Lord. He has a perfect plan for our life (Ephesians 2:10; Galatians 2:20; Proverbs 3:5-6).

If we look for fulfillment in one person, rather than in our union with Christ in us, this sets us up for continual disillusionment and frustration. The real enemy of marriage is to take one another for granted, and to make everything and everyone - even our children - more important than our marriage.

We are partners in life with our mate, and we serve King Jesus together.  This viewpoint allows us to support, admire, respect and love each other as we enjoy one another's company. We make plans to play and pray together often and frequently.

Prayer:

Father God, help us with our unrealistic expectations for our marriage. Teach us that looking outside of our marriage for fulfillment from someone else is always a mistake. No matter how great the other person is, second marriages are never as good as our only marriage could be with the history and memories of our original family ties and experiences.

Help us to make time to enjoy each other, even if it is simply a shared jaunt to the grocery store, thrift store or doctor's office. We enjoy the simple pleasure of one another's company in the simple times of life. Remind us that as we find our fulfillment in our relationship with You, we are two completed individuals becoming one flesh through our relationship with You.

Thought for the Day:

In a Good Marriage, we choose to love even when we disappoint each other, to forge a friendship from our joint interests, and to enjoy one another' company through both the trials and the joys of life; and our commitment to one another helps us to strengthen our commitment to God as well.

A More Perfect Union

Every human being has peculiarities and hang-ups that drive other people crazy, or irritate them at best. We may be frustrated with their issues, but we have issues that frustrate them as well. When we understand this fact, we have more patience with others.

We stop judging them and criticizing them, and we just accept them as they are, and give them the freedom to exist without our censure. Sometimes, their behavior does more than irritate us. It may abuse or wound us. Then, we need to lovingly confront them.

As we chat about the issue and brainstorm other forms of behavior that would be more loving, we listen if they defend their actions in order to see the matter from their perspective. Maybe we are causing the offensive behavior by our words or behavior.

If that is not the case, then when they slip back into their old habit, we kindly remind them of the third option that they agreed on, and ask them to follow it. They will soon learn that we will not allow this negative behavior and will usually try their best to change.

If our behavior is wounding them in some manner, we will adjust our habits to be more kind and understanding. That is what caring and love are all about. Adjusting our behavior is a small action in order to improve our relationships. Discarding a relationship is traumatic for everyone.

Developing a deeper spiritual and emotional bond is worth the effort. Growing together in our relationship into a more perfect union is a delight for everyone involved. Personal growth makes us more satisfied with our life as well.

Living with an attitude of compassion and love for others will foster deeper relationships for us. Compassion includes wanting what is best for our friend, child or mate, and a concern for their suffering and misfortune; and love is a deep affection and approval that allows us to put their needs above our own.

Rather than focusing on their shortcomings, we focus on their godly nature and positive characteristics and actions, and often compliment and encourage them for these qualities. This helps to accentuate their positive attributes in our mind and theirs.

Prayer:

Father God, remind us that we often allow circumstances to break our fellowship with others. We determine that we are better off without them in our life, and we fail to confront the issues we do not like or to forgive their humanity for what it is. Give us opportunities to learn relational skills that will enhance our bond. We want to pursue holiness, rather than happiness.

You may have put this person into our life to knock off our own rough edges; so, getting along is advantageous for us as well. Remind us that we may be causing their behavior, and that they are simply reacting to our negative behavior and character flaws. If we change our attitude and actions, theirs may change as well.

Thought for the Day:

In relationships, give each other the benefit of the doubt, employ compassion and love to care about the other person and to help meet their needs, so their offensive behavior will stop bothering us; when we both walk in the Spirit, this is a guarantee that we will experience more harmony in our union.

Please Hurry, God

Waiting is no fun. 

It wastes our valuable time, crowds our schedule with backed up responsibilities, tries our patience, and puts us in a bad mood. I used to hate to wait. My mate always arrives everywhere early; therefore, I wait most of the time.

In our society, we wait at airports, grocery lines, doctor's offices, traffic, for meetings to start, for people to arrive - rarely on time, etc. I used to end up grouchy, frustrated and even angry at times, when I had to wait.

During one period in my life, God's Spirit led me to focus on His fruit of kindness. I am basically a kind person, but at times I do and say unkind things. So I really needed intense work in this department. As I focused on kindness, God showed me a secret.

Patience is the root of all the fruit of the Spirit. If we are impatient we do not show kindness, love, joy, peace, gentleness, goodness, meekness or faith either. Yet, when His fruit of patience operates in our thoughts, permeating our soul, we can more easily and readily express all of the other fruit of the Spirit.

Patience does her perfect work in us and prepares and equips us to accomplish every good work to which God calls us to perform (James 1:4-8). We learn to rest in the Lord, so that we do not fret or allow anxiety to ruin our life (Psalm 37:7).

I learned to bring a book to read or needlework to concentrate on while waiting; or to greet people in lines and offices, and to listen to them as they share their needs and feeling; to pray for my list of those needing answers from God; to reread my 3x5 cards containing verses I am attempting to focus on and to remember; and to praise God for His goodness and grace, as well as for His little hugs and acts of kindness toward me all day long.

As we continually wait on the Lord, and focus on allowing patience to shroud our soul, then kindness and serenity permeate our thoughts, words and actions (Hosea 12:6). His strength in us is our stronghold, and it gives us courage to face every trial (Psalm 27:14).

Prayer:

Father God, when we learn to wait on You in Your timing and Your way as we accomplish all that You call us to do, we find Your grace to help us (Psalm 123:2). Teach us to patiently wait on You like a servant who waits on the bidding of his/her master (Psalm 25:5). Like a farmer, we wait for the harvest that You provide for us each day. We anticipate Your coming, which is certainly nearer each day (James 5:7-8; Titus 2:13).

We know that You wait on high, longing to be gracious to us, and to show us compassion and unconditional love in every area of our life. We are blessed among all of humanity when we long for You as well (Isaiah 30:18). We maintain our hope in Your provision, and we do not look to our human reasoning, or to anyone else, to bless us or to satisfy the needs of every living thing (Jeremiah 14:22; Psalm 145:15-16).

Thought for the Day:

We watch expectantly for the Lord, we wait for Him who is our help and shield, and we persevere in our hope in Him, and in the encouragement from Our Savior and King; as we also trust in His Word and rely on His Spirit every moment of our day and night.

- Psalm 33:20; 130:5; Micah 7:7

Getting all the Facts

 Rather than blaming someone else when conflict arises in a relationship, questioning our motives, attitude, and actions should serve as our first impulse. What are we thinking, saying or doing that is pulling this negative reaction from this other person?

There is no need for flattery, little white lies, or undue praise, but we can use a little patience, understanding, compassion and encouragement to deflate what may turn into a raging war. Living as a peace-maker is the key to successful relationships.

We can calmly question their decision in order to gain clarity, rather than assuming that we know their mindset or motives. Maybe we misunderstand their direction or reasoning. We lovingly and loyally stand on their side of the fence, until they prove they do not care about us, our needs or our opinions.

We do not defer our needs, allow people to walk all over us, or enable them to abuse or belittle us. We let them make their decisions, and then we make ours. We are not afraid to speak the truth in love in a confident, rational manner.

Jesus did not shrink from confrontation in relationships. He attempted to jar people out of their complacency, pride, rebellion and wrong choices (Judas and Peter in Matthew 26; and the woman at the well in John 4). He knew that speaking the hard truth was for their own good.

First, we look inward to see if we are causing their behavior by our words, attitude or actions. Then we suggest a change in us or in them. We help one another to pursue godliness (1 Timothy 6:11) with our whole heart, mind and strength.

Prayer:

Father God, often we cannot even life in harmony with our self. We argue with our self and question our thoughts, actions and motives all the time. Yet, we are also quick to accuse or misjudge someone else. This causes a rift in our relationships and unnecessary bitterness in our heart against them.

Remind us to get all the facts behind their words or actions before we over-react to their choices. Help us to see issues from their perspective too, and not just from our own. Teach us that if we both have valid concerns, we can pray together and brainstorm until You reveal to us a third option that fulfills both of us at the same time that it solves our problem.

Thought for the Day:

When there is conflict in our relationships, we first question our behavior, rather than theirs; how are we causing them to react to us as they are? Then we ascertain from them, their motives and thinking rather than assuming the worst. If we cannot agree, we can always brainstorm until we find a third option on which we can both agree.

Embracing the Mind of Christ within Us

A person without the Spirit of God residing within them cannot understand the things of God, because these truths are spiritually discerned. Unbelievers consider Biblical truth as foolishness and they make fun of Believers (1 Corinthians 2:14-16; 1 Peter 4:17).

It is only as we repent of our sinful ways, and believe in, trust in and rely only on Christ in us, that we can comprehend God's truths through His Spirit and the mind of Christ (Philippians 2:5-11). This changes our life forever.

We compare spiritual things with spiritual; not in human wisdom, but as they are pointed out to us by God's Spirit within us (1 Corinthians 2:13-16). God replaces our fears with His power, love and sober mind (2 Timothy 1:7). We have hope all the days of our life in God's grace for us through Jesus Christ (1 Peter 1:3, 13).

Learning to walk in the Spirit is a daunting task, because we have to stop listening to our human reasoning, and chasing our own dreams; and instead, to start embracing God's will for us (John 5:30; 1 John 2:6; Romans 8:1-39). As His children, we follow God just like Jesus did (Ephesians 5:1).

We do not only worship with the church, but we also practice pure religion, which is righteous before God. We support missions in our own city and throughout the world, we visit orphans and care for widows, and we reject the vain philosophies of this world as useless (James 1:27).

Human wisdom is lacking when compared to God's wisdom and discernment. We learn to think with the mind of Christ given to us by the Spirit of God, even if we are mocked by those without God's Spirit in them (1 Corinthians 2:5-15).

We receive Christ's mind through faith in Him as the Spirit transforms our mind (John 1:12; 1 John 5:12; Romans 12:1-2). We use the measure of Philippians 4:8 on our thoughts and we find the source of our negative thoughts by bringing them to God for healing.

Once we realize that we already have the mind of Christ, because He abides within us by His Spirit, we access His mind by consulting Him each moment of our day (Proverbs 3:5-6; 1 Corinthians 2:16). This changes our perspective, purpose and priorities forever.

Prayer:

Father God, teach us to control our thoughts until they line up according to Your Word (2 Corinthians 10:4-5). Then Your indescribable peace will infiltrate every area of our life. It is hard to reject the thoughts we obtained through a lifetime of experiences; but we choose to believe Your Truth, rather than the lies spoken to us by Satan and by well-meaning, condescending or bullying people in our past (Romans 8:6).

You gave us the mind of Christ, which gives us sound thinking, and allows us to focus on Your Kingdom, rather than pursuing the goals formulated for us by this sin-filled world. We want to learn to reject our carnal thoughts, and to focus instead on things of Your Spirit through Christ in us. You are our Creator and Provider and we give You all of the praise and glory for Your work in our life.

Thought for the Day:

Recognizing the motivation and perspective of the mind of Christ, we develop humility, as well as obedience to the leading of God's Spirit (Philippians 2:5-8); we live each moment dependent on our Father God (Luke 5:16; Proverbs 3:5-6; Ephesians 4:30); we use every opportunity to share the gospel with the lost (Luke 19:10); and we have compassion on the brokenhearted and less fortunate than we are (Matthew 9:36).