Every
human being has peculiarities and hang-ups that drive other people crazy, or irritate
them at best. We may be frustrated with their issues, but we have issues that
frustrate them as well. When we understand this fact, we have more patience
with others.
We
stop judging them and criticizing them, and we just accept them as they are,
and give them the freedom to exist without our censure. Sometimes, their
behavior does more than irritate us. It may abuse or wound us. Then, we need to
lovingly confront them.
As
we chat about the issue and brainstorm other forms of behavior that would be
more loving, we listen if they defend their actions in order to see the matter
from their perspective. Maybe we are causing the offensive behavior by our
words or behavior.
If
that is not the case, then when they slip back into their old habit, we kindly
remind them of the third option that they agreed on, and ask them to follow it.
They will soon learn that we will not allow this negative behavior and will usually
try their best to change.
If
our behavior is wounding them in some manner, we will adjust our habits to be
more kind and understanding. That is what caring and love are all about.
Adjusting our behavior is a small action in order to improve our relationships.
Discarding a relationship is traumatic for everyone.
Developing
a deeper spiritual and emotional bond is worth the effort. Growing together in
our relationship into a more perfect union is a delight for everyone involved.
Personal growth makes us more satisfied with our life as well.
Living
with an attitude of compassion and love for others will foster deeper
relationships for us. Compassion includes wanting what is best for our friend,
child or mate, and a concern for their suffering and misfortune; and love is a
deep affection and approval that allows us to put their needs above our own.
Rather
than focusing on their shortcomings, we focus on their godly nature and
positive characteristics and actions, and often compliment and encourage them
for these qualities. This helps to accentuate their positive attributes in our
mind and theirs.
Prayer:
Father
God, remind us that we often allow circumstances to break our fellowship with
others. We determine that we are better off without them in our life, and we
fail to confront the issues we do not like or to forgive their humanity for
what it is. Give us opportunities to learn relational skills that will enhance
our bond. We want to pursue holiness, rather than happiness.
You
may have put this person into our life to knock off our own rough edges; so,
getting along is advantageous for us as well. Remind us that we may be causing
their behavior, and that they are simply reacting to our negative behavior and
character flaws. If we change our attitude and actions, theirs may change as
well.
Thought
for the Day:
In
relationships, give each other the benefit of the doubt, employ compassion and
love to care about the other person and to help meet their needs, so their
offensive behavior will stop bothering us; when we both walk in the Spirit,
this is a guarantee that we will experience more harmony in our union.
