Due to the experiences of my childhood, I grew
up as a fearful and insecure person. I came to Christ at age 18, and the slow
process of inner healing began. Even as I grew spiritually, my soul was haunted
by the past and feared the future. With an analytical mind and organizational
skills, I appeared to be a person who had it all together.
The
underlying truth was that I subconsciously lived in wary anticipation of the
next circumstance totally annihilating me. I guarded against and opposed anyone
who threatened my security in any way. With my Italian genes, I am fiercely
passionate in all of my emotions. To those who knew me best, I presented a
puzzle in direct opposites.
Some
people took my tirades personally and were devastated, and withdrew emotionally
and/or physically from me. Those who understood me realized that my Italian
nature allowed me to laugh with as much abandon and passion as I used anger to
protect myself. My most endearing quality is my loyalty and faithfulness to
God, my family and God’s family, all traits of an Italian nature.
The
apostle John, being a sensitive soul, understood that if we continue to
entertain fears after our conversion, it is because God’s love has not yet
perfected some area in our life (1 John 4:18). We have not been healed in some areas of our past that are
still affecting our current life. (www.theophostic.com)
However, as we experience healing in our soul, we sense more and more that
God’s love protects us.
It takes a
while after surrendering to Christ for His Spirit to heal all the wounds from
our past and to give us the perfect comfort and security, which only His love
can provide. Do not berate yourself for your shortcomings. Everyone has them,
and no one has a right to reject you for them. They just manifest differently
in them than in you. Forgive yourself and readily forgive those who hurt you.
Prayer:
Father
God, remind us that taking time to walk in Your Spirit moment by moment
throughout the day helps us to walk in complete surrender and serenity. When
the pain of the past or the fears of the future raise their ugly heads, we can
realize that we are safe in the shadow of our Almighty in this one moment of
time. This thought gives us comfort and confidence.
Thought
for the Day:
Trust in
the Lord with all of your heart and do not depend on your human reasoning. –
Proverbs 3:5-6
