Emotional Honesty

Emotional honesty is an oxymoron. We are so adept at hiding behind masks that we do not even know how we really feel or how to express that to other people. Journaling our true feelings is a good way to start.

We can also meet regularly with a trusted friend and verbally express our true feelings and deepest thoughts. We may even surprise our self when we discover our deepest feelings.

Talking, drawing, music and writing releases our soul from the bondage of playing games and pretending to be someone other than our true self. We release pent up emotional energy that formerly robbed us of physical energy.

Then, staying in touch with our true feelings allows us to find the root causes of all of our negative emotions. We can deal with the issue, or put it in God's capable hands.

Imperfection brings with it a certain vulnerability, shame and fear of not surviving. However, perfectionism is a demonic plague on humanity. Once we rid our self of the need to be perfect we can breathe a refreshing breath of pure air. We allow God's Spirit to do His perfecting work in us (Matthew 5:48). 

We also learn to accept life as God allows it to play out in the moments of our day. We stop resisting and attempting to control the issues. Instead, we find out what God is saying to us through them. We look for the seed of a miracle in each one of them.

When our perspective on life changes, so do our attitudes, thoughts, feelings and actions. We stop trying to force God into our box. Our paradigm, expectations and goals remain fluid in order to obey the leading of God's Spirit.

We learn to cherish every aspect of who we are, even our failings. We are kind to our self and learn to have more compassion on other people. We see life from their perspective and stop judging them and our self, but relate to them with God's mercy and grace.

Prayer:

Father God, our fears are not rational or logical; and often, not even conscious. We react in fear because our current circumstances trigger the memory of an event from our childhood. People look at us as if we have two heads and judge us as emotionally unstable, unpredictable and unbalanced. Yet, the fact is that we are simply wounded children.

Help us to rid our soul of the painful memories which litter our past. Teach us to cling to You as our defense rather than to defend our self. That way, no enemy can prosper against us (Isaiah 54:17). You are our comfort and the lifter of our head (Psalm 3:3). You heal us from the inside out and cleanse us all over. You make all things new and bring us into Your holy hill in Your perfect time and way (2 Corinthians 5:17; Psalm 24:3-6).

Thought for the Day:

When we pass judgment on our self or someone else, we are taking God's place and abusing and wounding our self and others more deeply than the pain we already experienced in our past.

An Anchor for Our Soul

God gave us negative emotions in order to detect when something is wrong in our body, soul or spirit. They are safety precautions - flashing red lights to get our attention.

God provided them to protect us. We can take a searching moral and emotional inventory throughout the day to discern the sources of these negative thoughts, feelings and behavior.

As wounded individuals, we feel these slights and infractions on our personal space more vividly. Another person's words and actions trigger our defensive responses, which help us to survive.

However, we may find our self fearing a change or a negative response from someone that is not actually affecting our stability or security at all. It is their choice and bypasses our life entirely.

In this case, we pray for them, but do not attempt to control or influence their behavior. If they ask for our advice, we are free to give it. If we are safe, their behavior is really none of our business.

We fear the unknown aspects of life and we even dwell on eventual negative scenarios, fueled by our traumatized soul, in order to protect our self from the possible inevitability of these trying or debilitating circumstances.

We may cling to neurotic, addictive or compulsive behaviors in order to give our self a semblance of normalcy. We attempt to avoid the pain by defending our self with anger and other survival modes. We want to protect our self from further wounding.

We fill the emptiness within our soul with people, amassing worldly goods, increasing our bank account and providing our self with security in any way we can. We escape through addictions.

Certain triggers in life release a rush of adrenaline into our body and cause us to fight or flight. They hold power over our life and define our responses to people, places and events.

Triggers magnify our thoughts into extremes, which prevent us from clearly viewing a situation as it is actually transpiring. We need an anchor in order to keep our soul focused on the reality of what is going on around us.

These anchors can be a person, a piece of jewelry, our car keys, a Bible verse that we repeat as a mantra, something in the doctor's office that we can focus on to keep our self grounded in reality instead of controlled by illogical fears of the unknown.

Yet, a personal relationship with Jesus Christ is the only truly fulfilling anchor for our soul. Hiding under His wings within our spirit, we find a safe refuge and a high tower which provides peace regardless of the circumstances around us.

Prayer:

Father God, due to negative feelings of being unworthy and unlovable, we fear our past and do not want to embrace the future with faith in your faithfulness. Our fear paralyzes any attempts You make to set us free indeed (John 8:36), until we learn that Your faithfulness is stronger than all of our fears.

Thank You for teaching us to laugh at our foibles, to take our self less seriously, to relinquish the need for perfection,to look for the seed for a miracle in every trial and to enjoy life with the freedom of flexibility. You fill our life with Your presence, which alleviates our loneliness and anxiety. Your faith and courage within us give us the ability to face our woundedness, to heal and to walk in the freedom of Christ in us.

Thought for the Day:

There is no need to judge our self for our negative emotions and attitudes, because we developed them to ensure our survival; but now we can align our self with God's Word and enjoy the freedom of His presence and Spirit within us.

Renewed Mind - Part 2 - Healing for our Wounded Soul

 

Satan plants lies in our soul throughout the experiences of our life. These misconceptions cause us to over-react irrationally and with intense emotion in our current life situations.

There are personality issues and woundedness in every person’s soul, which may trigger our wounds and hinder us, or our partner, friend or relative from changing or growing spiritually.

We need to see life through their eyes, not only through our own. God will give us His agape love to accept them for exactly who they are. Then we can also pray for them to be all that God wants them to be.

If we put their needs above our own, He gives us the patience to love them through their episodes. We realize that they are reacting from fear and woundedness, which our behavior triggered; and we do not take their rage or sullenness or impatience personally.

We pray for them and love them even more when they are behaving badly than we do when they are rational and kind. They have no idea why they are acting this way, but God does.

All negative behavior is a red flag to alert us of the woundedness in our soul. It may also be a false belief that is now an idol in our soul, because we give our pet peeves and misconceptions too much importance in our life.

We can take these irrational beliefs to God and gain His perspective on them, asking Him to change our focus about them until they lose their importance to us.

During rational moments, when no one is in a hurry or in need of our time, we can offer to pray with our spouse, friend or family member about their negative emotions.

They may be as clueless about their behavior as we are. They can start by journaling what they were thinking during their outburst. What thoughts were going through their mind? What did we do that triggered this reaction in them?

As we pray together, these problems are resolved as God reveals their root and origin, uncovers Satan's lie for us, and then speaks His truth to our soul. ( www.theophostic.com )

Prayer:

Father God, remind us that our soul longs more for a relationship with You than with a person. We often go from one person to another in this life, trying to find our soul mate, or someone to complete us.

Yet, the only way we can feel fulfilled is through deepening our commitment and our relationship with You. This is true even for married people. The more we find acceptance and develop satisfaction in our relationship with You, the more we can serve our mate out of our love for You (Ephesians 5:22, 6:7; Colossians 3:18, 23-24).

Thought for the Day:

Our support and acceptance of our partner’s, friend's or relative's shortcomings will do much to improve our attitude, as well as to improve their behavior through our love and consideration of their needs above our own.