Marriages can be withdrawn, combative, detached, a platonic friendship, or fulfilling for the couple. The choice is ours to make as a twosome. Pursuing one another each and every day is a worthwhile direction to take. Kindness, compassion, and cherishing make a great foundation for any relationship.
We can have a thriving marriage or a complacent one, a nourishing relationship or a distant one, a caring and happy connection or a self-centered and intolerant one. Again, the choice is ours. Do we prefer our mate above our self, or do we care more for our self than the one we profess to love?
Many times, we feel that we are the one that sacrifices for our mate more than they pay attention to our needs. We set our self up as a martyr, and we get resentful when our mate wants more from us than we are capable of giving. Keeping our focus on God’s will for us as a couple will keep negative emotions in check.
A healthy, happy, fulfilled mate will increase our happiness and fulfillment too; and contributing to our mate’s contentment in our relationship is a small price to pay for someone we profess to love. A solid commitment to our marriage will prevent us from losing our love for one another.
The wisest priority in our marriage is to love God first and foremost, and then nurture our spouse as an outpouring of our love for Him. The more we love Him, the more love we have for each other. We serve each other with His love from within us, and as one area of our service to God (Galatians 5:13).
Christian marriage counselors agree that making a commitment each new morning to love our spouse with God’s unconditional, agape love will make all the difference in our emotional, mental, and physical connection as a couple. God is the third chord in our three-fold tie, which unites us (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).
Prayer:
Father God, help us to have a sense of humor that learns to laugh at our self, and to forgive our mate his/her failings. Arguing, blaming, deliberately hurting each other, etc. sabotage our own relationship. Teach us how to accept each other without attempting to change each other, but for both of us to willingly change our self to meld together more readily as one flesh. Help us to keep a loving attitude in spite of our mate’s shortcomings, realizing that we are not perfect either.
If our mate constantly hurts us emotionally or physically, help us to understand their underlying need that causes them to react to us in this manner, so that we can help each other to heal and to thrive. If our mate will not relinquish their inner pain, and continues to inflict their pain on us, give us the courage to protect our self, and to separate for the purpose of reconciling in the future.
Thought for the Day:
Setting boundaries around our marriage that nourish and protect our relationship will keep others from attempting to come between us and our spouse, because they discern our bond and regard it with sanctity, rather than to see any discord between us and consider it an easy matter to come between us.
