Healing Relationships - Part 4

When our soul begins to heal, our personality, behavior and beliefs change. This may put our partner on the defensive and cause them to feel insecure.

Our relationship changes from independent, dependent or codependent to interdependent, and our family and friends are not used to it.

The healthy changes, which we make, will bring healing in our body, soul and spirit. It will help us to establish an interdependence with our mate, as they get used to the changes.

It will limit our negative reactions to one another, improve feelings of self-worth, change the way we meet our own needs and give us more energy to serve others as God’s Spirit leads us according to His will, rather than by codependent urges.

Intimacy increases, expectations decrease, and in conflict we blend differing ideas into a whole new concept on which we both agree. We are mutually interdependent with one another.

Unresolved disagreements cause a couple, which normally live in an atmosphere of cooperation, to form independent lives that disrupt their interdependence.

Interdependence means that it is healthy to have differing ideas, hobbies, interests, likes and dislikes, because these differences bring variety to the relationship.

Interdependence is living in a mutually reciprocal relationships. It is about forming intimate connections with another human being. We share the decision-making process in our relationship and mutually care about one another’s welfare and feelings.

We are conscious in our choices, own responsibility for the consequences of our actions, and readily admit when we are wrong.

We enjoy deeper, more meaningful associations, and greater productivity, service, contribution and growth in our relationship.

We cherish, appreciate, admire, respect, enjoy, love and care about one another, and we never miss an opportunity to affirm and to validate one another.

Prayer:

Father God, help those of us with wounds from the past to heal and to have the wisdom and courage to develop an interdependent relationship with our partner, children, co-workers, associates and church family.

Give us patience with them as they too heal from the wounds of their past. Then allow us to serve You together in our individual gifts and calling, according to Your will for each of our lives.

Thought for the Day:

Interdependent relationships bring harmony and enjoyment to any marriage, partnership or community.

The Emotions of Our Soul

God made human beings as a trinity, much as He is. The soul is one of the most spectacular parts of this trinity (body, soul, spirit). The soul includes our thoughts, decisions and emotions. These aspects of the human life are amazing when you consider the depth and ramifications of each of them. Our mind is an impressive, intricate physical organ made up of chemical charges and cells, which store every single word and event that ever occurs in our life.

God gave us so many emotions. Each main emotion branches off into dozens of nuances. Take anger for instance. Anger can be expressed in tones from mild annoyance all the way to extreme and violent rage. Here are some other emotions, which come in between these two extremes:

Soft Anger 
Annoyed, Frustrated, Cross, Apathetic, Peeved, Irritated, Cranky, Crabby, Bored, Impatient, Critical, Cold, Displeased, Rankled, Detached, Indifferent

Medium Anger 
Angry, Mad, Offended, Antagonized, Bristling, Sarcastic, Aggravated, Arrogant, Indignant, Inflamed, Affronted, Resentful, Incensed, Exasperated, Riled up

Intense Anger
Hostile, Aggressive, Livid, Outraged, Furious, Belligerent, Hateful, Appalled, Bitter, Ranting, Raving, Contemptuous, Disgusted, Vengeful, Vindictive, Violent, Irate, Menacing, Seething, Vicious, Spiteful

See what I mean! Feelings are aroused by verbal and physical signals, which we receive from stimuli, such as photos, nature scenes, people, pets, etc all throughout our day. Even inanimate objects like a car, jet plane or places elicit emotions from our soul.

The problem is that we often base our choices and decision on feelings. They are transitory and temporary at best, but the selections we make because of how we feel affect us for the rest of our life. God replaces our negative responses with the fruit of His Spirit. He calls us to temper our emotional responses with spiritual direction from His Spirit.

Prayer:

Father God, we have emotions that are so intense at times that we do not know what to do with them. We erupt in a negative emotion or wallow in self-pity and depression because we feel so overwhelmed. Help us to submit our soul to You for sanctification and to come to Your Spirit to receive Your fruit (Galatians 5:22-23), the character of Christ, in place of our negative human emotions.

Thought for the Day:

God’s Spirit replaces our negative attributes with His positive fruit. - Galatians 5:22-23

For more info on other emotions, see this page:

http://karlamclaren.com/emotional-vocabulary-page/