Healing Relationships - Part 4

When our soul begins to heal, our personality, behavior and beliefs change. This may put our partner on the defensive and cause them to feel insecure.

Our relationship changes from independent, dependent or codependent to interdependent, and our family and friends are not used to it.

The healthy changes, which we make, will bring healing in our body, soul and spirit. It will help us to establish an interdependence with our mate, as they get used to the changes.

It will limit our negative reactions to one another, improve feelings of self-worth, change the way we meet our own needs and give us more energy to serve others as God’s Spirit leads us according to His will, rather than by codependent urges.

Intimacy increases, expectations decrease, and in conflict we blend differing ideas into a whole new concept on which we both agree. We are mutually interdependent with one another.

Unresolved disagreements cause a couple, which normally live in an atmosphere of cooperation, to form independent lives that disrupt their interdependence.

Interdependence means that it is healthy to have differing ideas, hobbies, interests, likes and dislikes, because these differences bring variety to the relationship.

Interdependence is living in a mutually reciprocal relationships. It is about forming intimate connections with another human being. We share the decision-making process in our relationship and mutually care about one another’s welfare and feelings.

We are conscious in our choices, own responsibility for the consequences of our actions, and readily admit when we are wrong.

We enjoy deeper, more meaningful associations, and greater productivity, service, contribution and growth in our relationship.

We cherish, appreciate, admire, respect, enjoy, love and care about one another, and we never miss an opportunity to affirm and to validate one another.

Prayer:

Father God, help those of us with wounds from the past to heal and to have the wisdom and courage to develop an interdependent relationship with our partner, children, co-workers, associates and church family.

Give us patience with them as they too heal from the wounds of their past. Then allow us to serve You together in our individual gifts and calling, according to Your will for each of our lives.

Thought for the Day:

Interdependent relationships bring harmony and enjoyment to any marriage, partnership or community.

Spiritual Healing - Part 3

Focusing on God

We often react to people and situations without thinking. We usually over-react because we do not have all of the facts. Then, because of our insecurities, we exaggerate the incident in our mind and end up falsely accusing others. At other times, the action from the other person pushes buttons from our past and we are instantly incensed   ( www.theophostic.com ).

Sometimes, we allow another's behavior to continue until we cannot stand it anymore, and then we finally react in anger. Change will often affect us negatively; or if we get tired, we will get grouchy and easily angered. The cure for this is to focus on the will of God in the situation. This brings instant peace to the circumstances.

As we stay focused on God, we live in His perfect peace (Isaiah 26:3). We also give God charge over our attitudes, behavior, desires and thoughts. Any time our attitude turns negative, we can be sure that we are either neglecting some legitimate need that we have, or we are harboring an inordinate need that is an idol in our life and that we need to surrender to God.

If we fail to consult the Lord about the issue, then we often end up inappropriately dealing with it our self. As a Believer, we can realize that nothing will occur in our life, which is not already part of God's plan for us. He works out even the most horrific issues for our good (Romans 8:28). This reminds us to look for the seed of a miracle in every trial. God is good all the time.

Prayer:

Father God, Your Word advises that sweet and bitter water cannot come out of the same well (James 3:11). Fill our mind with Your thoughts. Keep our thoughts focused on only that which is pure, true, noble, righteous, lovely, admirable, excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8). Cleanse us from any wicked way in us and lead us in Your everlasting ways (Psalm 139:23-24).

Thought for the Day:

Love does not dishonor others, is not self-seeking or easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. - 1 Corinthians 13:5