A Good Marriage - Love Languages

Marriage is about the union of two people - two families of people. It brings them together in a legally binding relationship which God intends to last a lifetime.

Life happens, though; the death of a spouse, or of the marriage, sidetracks our best intentions. Our negative emotions influence whether or not we can forgive each other, or if we harbor anger and resentment.

It is best to investigate right away whenever we feel anger toward our spouse. We cannot allow hurt, anger or bitterness to accumulate in our heart and erect walls between us and those who love us.

These negative emotions prevent unconditional love, appreciation and respect from growing in our marriage. Emotional stress added to the stresses of daily living will encourage the desire in us to escape from our marriage.

Satan will certainly, gladly provide us with the opportunity to destroy what God has joined together. Do not be surprised when controversy, disagreements and arguments erupt in your marriage.

These do not indicate a problem in the relationship; but merely a normal adjustment between two very different people. God puts opposites together so that we can stretch, grow, and learn from one another.

God desires that we appreciate one another's individual strengths, and that we allow them to overcome the weaknesses in each other. No one spouse has all the answers.

It is only as we really listen to one another, consider each other's opinions, feelings and needs - and then compromise our desires that we can find equitable solutions to the issues that will most certainly arise.

Our goal in any argument is never to run each other down, wound with critical words, bring up the past in a hurtful manner or stoop to abusive verbal or physical behavior.

We simply hash out our disagreements in an honest and harmonious manner, striving to find common ground, giving in on matters that are not really important to us, and standing firm about the things which mean the most to us.

Prayer:

Father God, You gave each of us a unique personality, made from genetics, upbringing, personality and learned qualities. Remind us that we all need to receive love in different ways: words of affirmation, physical or emotional attention, acts of service, romantic gifts and gestures, or a conglomeration of these. This special language is all our own and allows us to feel loved and nurtured by our spouse.

Help us to understand that if we withhold these gifts of affection from one another, we are undermining our relationship and sabotaging our marriage - setting our self up for a cold and distant existence. Yet if we shower each other with love, we are ensuring that our marriage will go the distance and last a lifetime.

Thought for the Day:

Everyone has their own unique love language that fulfills them and allows them to feel understood, appreciated and cherished; make it a point to ask your mate what his/her love language is and then give him/her expressions of that love some time during  every single day.

Visit:

http://www.5lovelanguages.com

Two Becoming One Flesh - A Fulfilling Marriage

The marriage of a man and a woman is a union of two individuals joined as one (Ecclesiastes 4:9-11; Ephesians 5:31). God intends for them to serve Him as a team, as co-heirs with Christ of His entire Kingdom (Romans 8:17).

At first, a couple's attraction increases their love for one another. Yet, over time they gradually stop considering one another, doing the tiny thoughtful gestures for one another that mean so much and sharing the same goals and purpose in life (Ephesians 5:33).

As the years progress, the couple eventually take each other for granted, stop romantic overtures and make other pursuits their priority in life. They co-exist, but do not work as a team or care about each other's needs as much as they care about their own.

To the Wife:

There are many women who take their husband for granted. Some insist on spending more money than he makes. Others find their fulfillment in their home and children or in their job and ignore their husband's needs.

They get caught up in the pressure of their daily demands and make no time for their husband. They forget that men need visual stimulation to feel loving, and they make no effort to groom and dress nicely for him at home.

They forget to make his favorite meal, to shop for his preferences and to make time to listen to him share about his day. A wife is given the privilege of following the outline given in Proverbs 31.

She will flourishes as a wife, mother, homemaker and business woman in this creative capacity given to her by God. God's Spirit will give her wisdom and strength to minister to her family.

To the Husband:

A man will expect his wife to be sweet and accommodating and to keep him as her primary focus (Ephesians 5:25); yet, it is often the husband's poor choices, which keep the marriage in a state of perpetual insecurity and financial loss.

No woman can be sweet and submissive when her husband stops considering her needs and keeps her life in turmoil. Then he blames her hormones or personality for her negative reactions to him.

God desires to charge the husband to dwell with and to provide for his wife with love and understanding (1 Peter 3:7). If he does, then his wife will more easily submit to His loving leadership.

A man’s responsibility is to protect his wife and to give her the feeling of safety and security she deserves. He will not take her for granted, if he realizes everything which she does for him throughout the day after day (Ephesians 4:2, 32; Romans 12:16).

To the Couple:

Any couple can keep romance alive with spontaneous little gifts, daily times to snuggle, helping each other around the house, date nights, listening with focused attention, and an unexpected phone call or an email during the day proclaiming their love for one another (1 Peter 4:10). Try it and see!

Prayer:

Father God, the opposite sexes are just that - opposite. It seems that You played a trick on humanity by causing opposites to attract. However, Your plan all along was for opposites to complement one another.

We can draw from one another's strengths to make up for our own weaknesses. Remind us that we are a team, and we will dwell together in unity as we work and pray together under the direction of Your Holy Spirit (Psalm 133:1).

Thought for the Day:

As we make an effort to increase our love for each other until it overflows, we will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. - 1 Thessalonians 3:12; Ephesians 5:21