A Good Marriage - Love Languages

Marriage is about the union of two people - two families of people. It brings them together in a legally binding relationship which God intends to last a lifetime.

Life happens, though; the death of a spouse, or of the marriage, sidetracks our best intentions. Our negative emotions influence whether or not we can forgive each other, or if we harbor anger and resentment.

It is best to investigate right away whenever we feel anger toward our spouse. We cannot allow hurt, anger or bitterness to accumulate in our heart and erect walls between us and those who love us.

These negative emotions prevent unconditional love, appreciation and respect from growing in our marriage. Emotional stress added to the stresses of daily living will encourage the desire in us to escape from our marriage.

Satan will certainly, gladly provide us with the opportunity to destroy what God has joined together. Do not be surprised when controversy, disagreements and arguments erupt in your marriage.

These do not indicate a problem in the relationship; but merely a normal adjustment between two very different people. God puts opposites together so that we can stretch, grow, and learn from one another.

God desires that we appreciate one another's individual strengths, and that we allow them to overcome the weaknesses in each other. No one spouse has all the answers.

It is only as we really listen to one another, consider each other's opinions, feelings and needs - and then compromise our desires that we can find equitable solutions to the issues that will most certainly arise.

Our goal in any argument is never to run each other down, wound with critical words, bring up the past in a hurtful manner or stoop to abusive verbal or physical behavior.

We simply hash out our disagreements in an honest and harmonious manner, striving to find common ground, giving in on matters that are not really important to us, and standing firm about the things which mean the most to us.

Prayer:

Father God, You gave each of us a unique personality, made from genetics, upbringing, personality and learned qualities. Remind us that we all need to receive love in different ways: words of affirmation, physical or emotional attention, acts of service, romantic gifts and gestures, or a conglomeration of these. This special language is all our own and allows us to feel loved and nurtured by our spouse.

Help us to understand that if we withhold these gifts of affection from one another, we are undermining our relationship and sabotaging our marriage - setting our self up for a cold and distant existence. Yet if we shower each other with love, we are ensuring that our marriage will go the distance and last a lifetime.

Thought for the Day:

Everyone has their own unique love language that fulfills them and allows them to feel understood, appreciated and cherished; make it a point to ask your mate what his/her love language is and then give him/her expressions of that love some time during  every single day.

Visit:

http://www.5lovelanguages.com

Choosing to be Vulnerable

Too often I meet people who are destroyed by the unfaithfulness of people in their life. They are abused by a parent, disappointed by decisions made for them by those in authority over them, abandoned by a spouse, traumatized by infidelity, or overwhelmed by grief from some loss in their life.

Through life's trials, I have learned that all people are inherently untrustworthy. You and I fall into that category as well. We never know how we will act or react to a moment of temptation and weakness. Yet, God calls us to love unconditionally.

If we withhold trust and love from others because we are wounded or fear the potential of being hurt, we cheat our self. We erect walls around our emotions and function in life from our mind only.

We refuse to feel anything because life is too painful for us. We do not emotionally invest in anyone, not even our spouse, children or church family. We simply show love by doing acts of service for them.

This attitude makes us feel like we are a success and doing our duty to others. Yet, this is a substitute at best - failing to fulfill us at the deepest levels of our soul.

We hide behind arrogance, which actually makes us more vulnerable and increases our load of unwanted emotional baggage. We collect the incidents of abuse in our soul and hold grudges, forgiving with our mind but never from our heart.

God is the only entity in life that we can truly trust. He always has our best interest at heart. Even if He disciplines us or allows life to bruise us, He never allows life to totally break us (Isaiah 42:3).

This makes life worth the risk of allowing our self to be vulnerable to hurt, in order to experience the joy of unfettered love and acceptance. We can even more freely love our self if we allow our self to love others (Mark 12:30-31).

 

Prayer:

Father God, our soul can only find our true and complete rest in You alone. You are our only salvation and constant comfort and strength. You alone are our rock and fortress. No matter what life throws at us, we will never be shaken as long as we keep our focus on You (Psalm 62:1).

Remind us that it is easier to forgive others when we realize that they are as vulnerable and human as we are. We can actually expect to be wounded by other people, but it hurts less when we have our faith in You rather than in our fellow sojourners in this life. You give us Your agape love to share with the world and it is healing and complete.

Thought for the Day:

God is our only help and shield from the inherent pain life brings (Psalm 33:20), because He alone is our strength in times of trouble (Psalm 37:39), and our courage in this insecure world (Psalm 130:5); we wait in silence before Him and find our hope only in Him (Psalm 62:5).

Deliverance from Evil

 

God is the Holy One of Israel; yet, He cares for each one of us individually, regardless of our circumstances. He is our redeemer and our strong tower (Isaiah 41:13-14; Psalm 46:1).

He actually holds our hand when we are afraid, and He promises to help each one of us. When we allow fear to overwhelm us, we fall into its trap; but when we trust the Lord, He keeps us safe (Proverbs 29:25; Psalm 34:4).

We see how Jesus calmed the storms for His disciples, and He abides within us and protects us as well (Mark 4:39-40). The angel of the Lord actually camps around those who honor God with their life, and He delivers us (Psalm 34:7).

Even if we are reviled or falsely accused when we are living righteously, God will reward us for it. Regardless of what any person says about us or threatens us with He is our defense (1 Peter 3:14; Deuteronomy 3:22).

God places His redeeming hand on our life, encourages us not to give place to fear and reminds us that He is our all in all (Revelation 1:17). He took on the form of a man in order to save us.

All He asks of us is to believe in Him (Mark 5:36). In failing to believe, we condemn our self to eternal damnation (John 3:18). In our belief, we accept God's eternal plan for our life (John 3:6-17).

Nothing we do, think or say, or anything that is in heaven or on the earth, can separate us from God's love (Romans 8:38-39). We are eternally His child and He loves us unconditionally.

Prayer:

Father God, You actually rejoice over us with singing (Zephaniah 3:17). We dwell in the shadow of Your wings and You give us shelter and rest. You are our refuge and fortress in this world of unrest, and we trust in You. Your faithfulness is a shield and strong tower for us. We have nothing to fear in the day or the night.

You give Your angels charge over us to keep us. Even if we fall, they are there to sustain and guard us. Since we love You, You rescue us, and You protect us when we walk in Your will and ways. We call on You and You answer us, deliver us and give us honor in any sort of trouble (Psalm 91:1-16).

Thought for the Day:

Since the Lord is with us, there is no reason for us to feel fear. Man can do nothing to us if God is right there with us, helping us and delivering us from every sort of evil. 

- Psalm 118:6-7