A Good Marriage - Common Ground

Winning is not the ultimate prize of life; it is the manner in which we finish the race that counts the most. It is often the last straggler across the finish line that receives the most attention, because they persevered to the very end.

Winning an argument is not necessary to feel validated either. We can concede that we are wrong, if indeed we are, without any shame or recrimination.

We have a viewpoint that differs from our employer's, friend's, neighbor's, child's, parent's or spouse's perspective; but no less right or wrong than theirs.

There is nothing heroic about destroying a marriage, because we soon realize that we were acting as pawns on Satan's game board, playing right into his hands and wreaking havoc for generations to come.

If both parties in a disagreement are willing to bear with one another and to lay our life down for each other, there is always a way to peacefully resolve all issues and to avoid fighting and drama.

Neither of us is the enemy, we are simply fellow sojourners in this life with equal rights and privileges in the family of God. Quickly apologizing from the heart for any hurt we cause during a disagreement goes a long way in keeping unity in our relations.

Repairing our relationships is so much more mature than rending them in half and going our separate ways - leaving a trail of broken hearts and lives behind us. A trained counselor can help us to negotiate our differences.

Seeking wisdom from God's Word and His Spirit during times of prayer can also help us to breach any gaps in our unity. We negotiate until we find common ground on which to stand.

Prayer:

Father God, You remind us not to separate what You bind together. You admonish us not to break any vow that we make, but to honor our commitment to one another with charity, patience and kindness. You want us to work together to find an equitable solution to any conflicts in our marriage, as well as in our affiliations at work and in Your Body.

Give us Your wisdom to maintain peace and to show Your agape love to those who wound us; to turn the other cheeks and to bear with one another's idiosyncrasies and foibles. Give us patience to love one another as Christ loves the church; so we can represent living sacrifices as a testimony to an unbelieving world.

Thought for the Day:

There is nothing heroic in winning at the cost of someone else's expense; but in laying down our life and serving one another with the love of our Father toward us.

Integration with God's Spirit

 

When we detach from the belief that we are only the sum of what we think and feel, we are able to integrate our true inner self with God's Spirit within us.

We see and forgive the causes of our faulty thinking and behavior and are healed. As we accept our feelings and idiosyncrasies without judgment, we can submit them to God's Spirit for sanctification.

We stop fighting our self and start growing in Christ. God's Spirit sets us free from the bondage of Satan's lies which controlled us for most of our life ( www.theophostic.com ).

We align our thinking with God's Word. Our days take on a hue of joy and peace unfamiliar to us in the past. The presence of God's Spirit within us helps us to see our faulty thinking and behavior without negative repercussions or condemnation (Romans 8:1).

We relax and trust in God's goodness and compassion. We pull the plug on the power which our negative feelings once held over our life. We learn to reject Satan's lies and to embrace God's Truth.

We no longer entertain them as real and important; and instead we view them as red flags which signal a deeper problem within.

Our realization, that our strong over-reaction to a person or experience comes from old wounds and unresolved conflicts, gives us more balance in our life and priorities.

We face our fears head-on and allow God's Spirit to diffuse them for us. We see the idols we erected in our life for what they are, and we cooperate as the Holy Spirit tears them down.

Patience does her perfecting work in us and things of this world no longer grip us with the former, inordinate, over-powering importance which the earthly and material issues used to hold in our life. We look forward to the miracles God plants in all of our trials.

Prayer:

Father God, we find joy in our tribulation (Romans 5:3), because of Your presence in them with us. You hold us in the safety of Your hand and shelter us under the shadow of Your wings (Psalm 139:10). We realize that the disappointments and wounds of our childhood hold no more power over our current moment, because You set us free from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:2).

We forgive those who hurt and used us; and we look forward to a new chapter in our life, full of Your blessings and new possibilities. Teach us to walk in Your Spirit every moment of the day and to do the works which You created us to do before we were even born (Ephesians 2:10).

Thought for the Day:

As we face the grief of our past with a spiritual viewpoint, the intensity of it diminishes and we are freed from the power of negative emotions, which used to infect our life.

Restoration of All Things

Read: Romans 5:8-10

“Through the Son, God also reconciled all things to himself, whether things on earth or things in heaven, thereby making peace through the blood of his cross.” - Colossians 1:20

God not only tells us that He loves us, but He also demonstrated this love when Jesus died for us while we were still sinners. Jesus justified us with His blood and saved us from God’s wrath, which He pours out on unrepentant mankind (John 3: 18). Once enemies of God, drowning in a sewer of sin, we are now reconciled to God through Christ’s death and saved through His life. Jesus reconciled us to God by taking the punishment for our sins. The word “reconcile” means to restore a relationship.

The Bible delights us with tender story after story of restoration. The prodigal son reconciles with his father, the lost lamb returns to the flock, the lost coin is found once its owner sweeps the whole house and a man sells all he has to buy a pearl of great price. In the last days before Christ’s return, God will reconcile all things to Himself. He will pour out His wrath on the unrepentant and He will exalt Jesus and all of those who humbled themselves, repented of their sin and reconciled with the Father through Jesus Christ.

Now that God reconciled us to Himself through Christ, He has given us the ministry of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 5:18). Our first step in delivering the message of reconciliation is to invite people to enter into a personal relationship to Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20). God is calling us all home to Himself. He desires for us to live with Him throughout eternity. No sin is severe enough to prevent the possibility of a relationship with God. No amount of time rejecting Jesus can eliminate our chances of reconciling with the Father. We merely need to surrender our will to His and to admit that we are sinners that need saving by His grace.

The next step in reconciliation is found in Matthew 18:15-17. This verse emphasizes how to restore our relationship with one another. If someone hurts you, go and tell that person why their behavior affected you negatively and express your desire for reconciliation. If this person listens, then the relationship is restored.

At times, a difference of opinion, or a differing viewpoint of the events that led up to this break in the relationship may hinder reconciliation. Humbly seeking forgiveness for your part in the dispute may bring restoration. If this person still refuses to reconcile, however, then a counselor or non-biased party may be able to arbitrate the issues and help you to iron them out.

But if the other person ultimately refuses to reconcile with you, then you have done your best to restore your friendship, and you can leave the person in God’s capable hands to deal with as He sees fit.

Prayer:

Lord Jesus, there are so many people all around us who do not enjoy the beauty for our fellowship with You. Please break down their walls of resistance and help them to be willing to hear the Good News of the Gospel. You died to set sinners free and to give us all eternal life. Help us to live authentic Christian lives and to share Your love with everyone You bring into our lives.

Thought for the Day:

A commitment to reconciliation brings peace and joy to everyone involved.

Volcanic Anger

Read: Proverbs 15:1-2

"Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.” - Eph 4:26-27 NKJV

I get so frustrated when I say something and people don't pay any attention to me. In the past, I felt like I was walking around with a bag over my head. I resorted to anger to get my point across. I acted like a volcano, bursting forth with a huge eruption and then cooling quickly. The only problem with this is that just as a volcano leaves scars on the earth, I also left scars on human hearts.

There is nothing wrong with feeling angry. God gave us anger as a legitimate emotion to protect us. The problem arises when we use anger inappropriately. I struggled for years, blowing up and then feeling sad that I hurt the people that I love. Several years ago, I learned a simple remedy.

Now I make sure to get the person's undivided attention before speaking. I ascertain all the facts before I form an opinion. I try to understand the other person’s viewpoint. Then, I voice my opinion, feelings or needs. I very rarely ever feel angry any more, because people usually take me seriously. I do not always get my way, but I do always agree with the decision that we ultimately choose.

Prayer:

Lord, remind me that You did not speak to Elijah in the wind, the earthquake or in the fire. Help me to have the incorruptible beauty of a tender and soothing spirit, which is a treasure in Your sight.

Thought for the Day:

The still, small voice still receives the most attention.