How to Prevent a Divorce

When people, joined by God in marriage, choose to divorce, there is understandably an immense amount of pain and brokenness, which affects both lives. Even the person who initiated the divorce will suffer trauma. Financial, physical and employment setbacks occur in both lives. The emotions in both parties are traumatized.

This may make no common sense; but in matters of the soul, it makes perfect sense. Our soul is divided into our mind, will and emotions, and all three are negatively affected by a divorce. We also have three ego states in our mind, called the Inner Parent, Inner Adult and Inner Child. The Inner Child of the person initiating the divorce will also experience shock and distress.

Even if the person really wants the divorce for various reasons, their Inner Child will still feel victimized. Their childlike nature, which needs nurturing, feels abandoned by the partner they are divorcing. They will often suffer feelings of rejection and abandonment right along with the person, which they no longer want to live with.

There are many unresolved issues in a relationship, which cause the marriage to dissolves into divorce. Years of underlying problems, formerly swept under the rug, are hanging in the air between the two parties. They blame each other, and some spouses are not willing to take any responsibility for the breakdown in the marriage.

We all have failings and idiosyncrasies, which may cause our partner to get weary and to wander. If we address these concerns instead of just giving up, we can find alternative methods of action. An equitable solution that is agreeable to both people will always improve the relationship. In humility, both partners can resolve the problems and allow God’s love to heal their wounds.

Truthfully, prior to any divorce, both partners need to forgive and to ask for forgiveness for the slights and issues they caused in the marriage. Mutual forgiveness will heal many injures, and may even prevent this drastic, unnecessary divorce. Then, there will be no more desire to separate, and the couple will joyfully end up growing old together.

Prayer:

Father God, our true fulfillment is found through service to You in our church and community, as well as in our marriage. We can serve our mate regardless of how we feel about them. In fact, we are serving You by serving them. This way we put our marriage in Your hands, relying on You to change us and our partner. You hate divorce and are not pleased with anyone who obtains a divorce without Biblical grounds for it (Matthew 19:9). Help us to bear one another's burdens and to fulfill Your plans for our life (Galatians 6:2).

Thought for the Day:

Divorce divides us from the one, which we thought would share our hopes and dreams and grow old with us, and it forces us into the death of a relationship once birthed in love. 

Accountability Partner

We all have areas of our life that we ignore; little habits, words and facial expressions, which are less than stellar. We do not even think about them...but other people see them. Even more importantly is the fact that God sees them too. He has been watching and dealing with us about these issues throughout our whole life. They are called "blind spots".

We merrily go about our life without noticing that our testimony is tarnished by what we say and by the way we act. That is why it is so good to have an accountability partner. Someone that we love and trust, and that we know "has our back" through thick and thin. They love and respect us in spite of all of our idiosyncrasies.

We choose an accountability partner who would never turn on us or hurt us by the intimate details of our life, which we share with them. They should be spiritual, and endeavor to follow Christ with their life as well. They see our blind spots, those little nagging issues, which we ignore or are unaware of, and they are not afraid to point them out to us in love.

They are committed to God, and care about us as a friend and a fellow Christian. They are humble and recognize that they have faults as well; and they are growing and changing in their own lives. We can share anything with them and they will keep our confidence. These particular people willingly pray for God to strengthen us and to give us wisdom.

Prayer:

Father God, Jesus had twelve disciples, but He only took three to the mountain to see His transfiguration. He had three special friends whom He knew cared for Him deeply and would need the vision of His glory to strengthen them as they carried on His work after His resurrection. Help us to find those faithful few whom we can trust with our life and who will help us to grow in Christ.

Thought for the Day:

Since we dwell on this earth together, let us help rather than hinder one another.

Are Our Habits Helpful?

 

The habits we develop throughout life control our thoughts, choices and behavior. Some of them cause us to sow to the wind, and then we reap the whirlwind (Hosea 8:7). Others prevent us from trusting in God, since we think that we can serve Him in our own strength. Habits should not control our life. That's the job of God's Spirit.

God will reveal the habits in our life, which are idols, and give us the power to lay them down at His feet (Philippians 2:12-13). We relinquish our habits and follow the leading of God's Spirit each moment of our day. As we submit to God, we can resist the devil and he will flee from us (James 4:7). We are no longer drawn to sin and bad habits, which destroy our life.

After Jesus rose from the dead, He "lead captivity captive" (Ephesians 4:8; Luke 16:19-31). He freed the Old Testament Saints from separation from God and led them into the heavenly realm (Psalm 16:10; Acts 2:27-30). Jesus is now our Advocate (1 John 2:1). He frees His New Testament Saints from Satan's deception and sin's temptation. He enables us to relinquish our habits good and bad.

We do not depend on good habits to accomplish God's will for our life. We live in the Spirit and we walk in the Spirit as we further God's Kingdom while we live on this earth (Galatians 5:16-25). We follow God's presence rather than human effort and habits. When God's Spirit abides within us, we are His children; and where He leads us, we will follow.

Prayer:

Father God, remind us to meditate on Your Word, to listen to Your voice and to walk in Your precepts. We no longer need habits when we have the powerful and active Spirit of God to shape our thoughts, words and deeds. Thank You for involving Yourself in every area of our life and for providing for all of our needs with Your glorious riches (Philippians 4:19). Show us where we fall short of Your glory and help us to walk only in Your ways (Romans 3:23; Deuteronomy 5:33). 

Thought for the Day:

When Satan takes our circumstances out of our hands, then we can cling closer to God. When we relinquish our problems to His care, He is better able to provide for us through them. - 1 Peter 5:7

Jesus Paid it All

When Lucifer rebelled in heaven, God cast him to the earth. He had no power or authority until Adam sinned and turned over the dominion of the earth to him. Thankfully, Jesus stripped Satan of all of his power when Jesus laid down His life on Calvary's cross and rose again from the dead (Matthew 28:18).

Satan's only tool now is deception. Weak-spirited people often fall for his wiles (1 Peter 5:8). Sadly, they think his thoughts are their own. They truly believe they are following their heart, but it is Satan's wishes they are serving. He wraps his thoughts in silver, but it ends up being tin foil. He embellishes his ideas with money and power, but they wind up as addictions, which ruin our life.

Once we come to Christ, we realize that we are now dead to addictions and alive to God (Romans 6:11). We lay our idols at Jesus' feet. We are crucified with Christ. We no longer live according to our ideals and goals, but in God's will by faith in Him who loved us enough to suffer the horrendous torture of Roman cruelty (Galatians 2:20). Jesus paid it all, and now we are free to walk in His new life (Romans 6:4).

Our focus changes to eternal values and we look forward to sitting at God's right hand with Jesus (Colossians 3:1). We read God's Word and see His ministry in the life of His Saints, who are just like us, mere mortals with a heart after God (Acts 13:22). Realizing that we do not need to earn God's love, we rejoice in His free gifts of salvation, redemption and sanctification (Ephesians 2:8; John 3:16-17).

With each new day we fall more in love with our Redeemer and our heart gushes with love and gratitude for all He did, is doing and plans to do for us (Hebrews 9:12). Intimate fellowship with Him fills every moment of our day and night, even in our dreams He speaks to us and we pour out our love to Him. Our favorite past time is praying, Bible reading and listening to His voice.

Prayer:

Father God, thank You for taking the form of a man and allowing Jesus to open the way to the Most Holy Place for us to enter (Matthew 27:51; Hebrews 10:19). We do not avail our self of this privilege as often as we should, because we focus too much on this life. Remind us that You dwell in us by Your Holy Spirit, and that He is the wind in our sails, which moves us through life according to Your will (Ephesians 2:10: Psalm 139:13)

Thought for the Day:

Fulfillment only comes to our life when we surrender all to God and rely only on His Spirit within us.

Perfect Children

 

As a parent, we dream of well-behaved children, who share our goals and dreams for their life, listen to our Godly wisdom and live according to Biblical principles. This is rarely the case, however, except in a few situations. Most of the time there are no perfect children, just like there are no perfect parents. We all require discipline.

Since God cares enough about us to discipline us, we need to care enough about our children to discipline them (Hebrews 12:5-6). This discipline is only for direct disobedience, not for childish behavior, which gets on our nerves. Children need to be children and to run, jump and play. If we do not give them opportunities to expend their energy at the park or outside in the yard, they will do it in the house at the least appropriate times!

God challenges us to encourage our children's individuality, which He creates in them. We pay attention to God's will for their life and we do not push them in the direction of our own aspirations for them. We discover the areas where our children excel and discover what their passion is. God places a call on each life and He has His plans for us before we were ever born (Ephesians 2:10).

Discipline allows children to feel safe and proves that we care about them and love them (Psalm 3:11-18). Consistency is the main ingredient whether we use a few swats on their rear, time out or the loss of some cherished item for a short period of time. God's discipline is for our good, not His own; and we discipline our children for their good, not our own. This helps them to grow up as self-disciplined individuals.

Prayer:

Father God, we thank You for Your Word, both Old and New Testament, in order to make us wise in this secular world and to use to raise our children according to Your nurture and admonition (Ephesians 6:4). Help us to proclaim Your Word to our children and to the world around us, through Your Spirit, bringing healing and salvation to them all because of Christ who abides within us (Isaiah 61:1-2; Luke 4:14-21).

Thought for the Day:

God's Word, taught from infancy, makes us wise individuals.

- 2 Timothy 3:14-17

A Life of Change

A relationship with Christ changes our whole life. Our nature, desires, friends, spirituality and lifestyle will all change. Sometimes, it even changes our address, family dynamics, church attendance, values, goals and dreams. The biggest change comes in the form of who we are. We are brethren, related to other Believers; and children of the Light, adopted into God's family.

Satan attempts to convince us that we are still sinners. We even call our self "sinners, saved by grace." This cripples our walk with God and keeps us tied to the earthly realm. Our focus is negative, which does not allow us to live in victory over sin. We subconsciously think that we have no recourse but to sin. Satan cripples our walk with this lie (John 10:10).

The devil wants us to believe that we have not changed, that God is not real and that the Christian walk is ridiculous or impossible. However, God is the author of sweeping transformation. He changes us at our very core, and His power has a positive effect on our daily walk, as well as our eternal destination. We can certainly resist sin, because it no longer appeals to us.

God turns us into Saints who walk away from sin and toward Christ. We leave a world that is dark in disobedience and deprivation and walk toward the light of the Lord (Ephesians 5:8). Our spirit, once dead in sin, is now Born Again (Colossians 2:13). We no longer struggle with our identity, because we see our self as a child of God (1 John 3:2). We have value in our relationship with Him.

Prayer:

Father God, when Christ moves into our life, He radically changes our motivation and behavior. Your Spirit gives us the desire and the power to walk in holiness (Philippians 2:12-13). Our character takes on Your divine nature (2 Peter 1:4). The fruit of Your Spirit replaces the negative characteristics of our personality (Galatians 5:22-23). We live and move and have our being in Christ (Acts 17:28).

Thought for the Day:

We build on salvation with sanctified living and we reach for the prize of the high calling of Christ. - Philippians 3:14

God's Presence In Us

 

We often implore our Heavenly Father to give us more patience, love, peace, joy, compassion, faith and strength. What we do not realize is that we already have all of the fruit of the Spirit resident within us through our salvation in Christ. God's Spirit and all of the attributes of God are already available to us.

The issue preventing them from manifesting is our flesh. Our flesh often masquerades as God's direction and we follow the wrong path. When seeking God's will, we are looking for a billboard, a loud speaker or a flashing neon sign, but it never comes. Our human reasoning quickly drowns out God's true guidance.

We second guess our first impression and miss God. God directs us from His Spirit within our spirit in a barely recognizable impression or thought. God's is a still, small voice, which is often overwhelmed by the cacophony of life's trials and demands. As we submit our desires and thoughts to God's Spirit and obey His direction for each moment of our day, we live in peace and rest.

It is only as we decrease, that Christ in us can increase (John 3:30). The more we minimize the influence of our flesh, the world and the devil in our life, the more we are able to access the fruit, gifts and power of the Trinity within us. God already has our life planned out for us (Ephesians 2:10; Psalm 139:16). We never need to deal with life in our own wisdom and resources.

Prayer:

Father God, nothing occurs in our life that is not already part of Your plan for us. There is no need to fear, attempt to control or to worry about our present and future circumstances. We can take a deep breath and exhale all of the tension and stress caused by negative emotions and life's events; then breathe in Your peaceful presence in all of its fullness. Even negative circumstances are a new adventure, because You are in control. You are not bound by time and You have an eternal perspective. You know the end from the beginning (Isaiah 46:10).

Thought for the Day:

Christ in us is our glorious hope for a fulfilled life and our eternal reality. - Galatians 2:20