My purpose in discussing the various personalities is to help us to appreciate and to help one another. With different personalities we are better able to function in various aspects of life and to work together as a whole society.
We can learn from one another and benefit from each other’s strengths, as we help each other with our weaknesses.We each have one of four predominant personality types with a few traits from the other types thrown into the mix.
We may dislike some aspect of someone’s personality, but if we understand why they act as they do, it helps us to appreciate their good points rather than to focus on their negative aspects.
It takes all sorts of people to make the world go around. The problem with personalities is that they are human and carnal. However, God is able to totally revamp our personality once we surrender our life to Him. He minimizes our weaknesses and enhances our strengths.
The Phlegmatic personality is the third in my series:
Phlegmatics are shy and quiet, low-keyed and relaxed, and accused of being boring. They never seek personal glory, nor do they push their own opinion or agenda.
They are trustworthy, loyal, calm, kind, sympathetic and consistent. They like routine and can do work which is boring and requires perfection. They are easy going and show little passion, because they lack in confidence and are afraid of doing something wrong.
They make competent, reliable, dependable and steady workers. They avoid conflict and would rather change themselves than to cause a disagreement. They feel nervous and upset in an argument and prefer to just give in and take the blame on themselves or forfeit their own wishes.
However, they are great negotiators and peacemakers. They use humor and wit to diffuse a tense or awkward situation. They do well in jobs with tedious, meticulous elements that do not include much interaction with people.
They like to focus and excel in one area, rather than to multi-task. They remain calm in confusion and stress. They tend toward procrastination, especially when unsure of what to do. They learn to make decisions according to the Will of God and look to Him to defend them.
They are submissive and good listeners. They will always pay attention, and will offer supportive feedback rather than criticism or advice. They quietly and politely take in and absorb the conversations of their friends.
They have few goals or aspirations of their own and they are in no hurry. They are observers rather than doers. They lack in discipline, organization and are overly compromising - all to their detriment.
Phlegmatic people are meek and inoffensive. They are submissive introverts who live to please others. Friendly with everyone, they are well liked. They are affectionate without smothering or distancing.
However, they need very little social interaction. Do not force them to socialize or make them responsible for any person or issue, because this drains their limited energy reserves. God helps them to develop deep, personal relationships a little at a time, as they rely on His strength.
They hide their emotions and do not get upset easily. They are not likely to express more than a smile or a frown. God teaches them to show their deeper feelings in ways that are more comfortable for them and meaningful to others.
They are almost immune to anger. They have extremely long fuses, and will only snap after a long period of prolonged and persistent abuse.Even then, they are more likely to retreat within their self or cry than to harm others.
They internalize issues and problems, rather than to speak their mind. They may feel critical of others and prefer not to get involved or sacrifice for others. They tend toward self-righteousness and are stubborn, often set in their ways. God teaches them through His Word to see the needs, rights and feelings of others.
They have trouble with saying “No” to anyone. However, in a conflict or when they feel abused, they end up feeling like a martyr. God helps them to show more outward support for the issues and injustices, which they really feel concerned about.
They enjoy spending time with friends, and are very loyal to these friends, sticking with them through thick and thin, even through abuse.
They do not like change and panic in new situations. They dislike pressure, resent being controlled and do not like to take any risks. They are good followers and they are stressed when ask to lead.
They do not crave excitement and dislike winning a competition or a game. They do not seek thrills, and enjoy predictable, quiet, ritualistic lifestyles.
They struggle with making a decision and prefer to have others make decisions for them. We can help them in their decision-making by giving them the pros and cons in a situation and helping them to think through all the ramifications in order to make their own decisions.
God teaches them to depend on Him for His opinion, rather to care so much about the opinion of other people.
Phlegmatics will unthinkingly make humorous remarks about the rights and feeling of others. They often have a wry, cutting sense of humor, which they use as a defense to protect themselves from the energy drain on their emotions when involved in more meaningful relationships.
Do not take their reticence personally. We can help them by not demanding physical attention and by doing things for them instead.
Prayer:
Father God, we Phlegmatics are deep spiritually. We understand faith and practice, and we are solid and dependable in our commitment to You. You gave us the character of loyalty and You help us to remain faithful.
We love Your Body and serving them. Help us to learn that submission to You unlocks our potential. Teach us to be more open and loving to others through our relationship with You and to learn that only through expending energy and becoming deeply involved with personal relationships can we reach maturity.
Thought for the Day:
Phlegmatics have a tendency to deal with their personal relationships with Christ in the same way they do any other deep relationship, as a spectator who does not get too deeply involved. As they submit to the Will of God they are less stubborn and more relational.
References:
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http://www.pastoral-counseling-center.org/Free-Temperament-Reports/Choleric-Helpful-Hints.htm
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http://temperaments.fighunter.com/?page=phlegmatic
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http://www.fighunter.com/index.php?page=temperaments
