“Even if my father and mother should desert me, you will take care of me.” – Psalm 27:10
In 1954, my baby brother
made his debut into our family. At the advanced age of 3 years, I did not share
in my parents’ joy. To start with, he came on MY birthday! Needless to say, I
did not get the appropriate attention on that day…my parents were otherwise
preoccupied. My mom was in the hospital for several days and I was not allowed
to see her. I felt lost and alone without her as my security. I stayed with
relatives who tried to make me eat spinach…YUCK!
They even put me in the
broom closet under the stairway, because I was naughty. It was dark in there,
and I cried. Equally as bad, however, was the fact that I did not get any
dessert, since I did not eat my spinach. My whole life followed suit to this
scenario with two more brothers coming along. Of course, my memories may be
more vivid and painful than reality, but this feeling that my needs did not
matter stayed with me as I grew up.
To top this off, my mom was
emotionally distant and my dad had a hair-trigger temper, due to deficiencies
in their childhood. I contemplated suicide many times as a teenager, because of
the painful reality of my unpopularity at school and my troubled home life. Eventually,
I gravitated toward other students who shared a similar social status with me.
After that, I never lacked for friends. As my ugly duckling persona developed
into a swan, my popularity in my circle of friends grew. I dated every weekend
and I went to more than one senior prom.
I still felt less than
whole, however. I had a hole in my heart that ached. I thought I needed my
parents’ acceptance; however, one fateful day I discovered the real solution in
my quest for love. A vivacious redhead in my yearbook class introduced me to
her new best friend, Jesus Christ. In Christ, I discovered the joy of being a
child of God. I relished the concept of a Father's grace, patience and
unconditional love, which I had never known.
God moved into my life and everything
changed. I found acceptance for my idiosyncrasies and supernatural direction
for my lack of talent. I experienced forgiveness for all of my sins. God has
mercy and compassion on whomever He chooses; and thankfully, He chose me (Romans
9:11-16). I no longer had to earn love,
because my Heavenly Daddy gave it to me as a free gift (Ephesians
2:8-10).
God promised never to leave
me alone and to do for me all that His Word promises (Genesis
28:15; Hebrews 13:5). This truth
transformed my life. I no longer cowered in a corner, but stepped up to the
plate and swung at every pitch the Lord lobbed my way. The shy, introverted
girl within me still blossoms into an extrovert every time the Spirit of God
commissions my services for His Kingdom’s work. In Jesus Christ, I found the
greatest love of all time…Love that laid down His own life for me.
Prayer:
Father God, in Your
paradoxical economy, we gain by losing (Philippians 3:7-8), we save our life by dying daily to the old carnal
nature (Matthew 10:39; Luke 17:33), we receive by giving with a joyful heart (Acts 20:35), we are exalted through humility (James
4:10), we find Your strength through our
weaknesses (2 Corinthians 12:10) and we achieve freedom by serving (Romans
6:18). Thank You for giving us all the
chance to live as members of Your family and to enjoy Your love, which never
fails (1 Corinthians 13:1-8; Psalm 136).
Thought for the Day:
God will never leave us
alone or forsake us, and His love never ends. – Deuteronomy 31:6