As
humans we connect in several ways: physical, mental, spiritual and emotional.
We bond with different people in different areas. Some people are not Born
Again, and we are not able to relate with them spiritually.
Others
are not able to attach emotionally, and our unity is limited. We are deprived by
them of the emotional intimacy that we crave. They may put barriers between us
emotionally, because they are easily wounded, and our assertiveness violates
their boundaries.
We
can spend hours with them and still feel empty. There is no emotional
significance between us. They do not respond to us, sense who we are or what we
need, or connect to our perspective. We are not in tune with one another.
We
have no deep connection that nurtures love and relationship. We never feel like
we are completely seen, heard or understood by them. This disconnect may affect
us mentally and physically as well, because we lack a relationship at the
deepest level of who we are.
Harmony
and significance are important in our ability to bond with someone; otherwise,
we drop between the cracks and feel unloved. We may attempt to improve that
connection, but it is never genuine or fulfilling. We doubt our self, so we strive
to change our self to be more lovable.
The
real issue here is to realize that we are a person too. We can continue to have
a superficial relationship with this person, if that is what they prefer. We
cannot change them or influence them in any way that helps them to meet our
needs.
They
may try for a while, but then revert back to their true self. Neither do we neglect
our true self in the process, but we do not put undue expectations or pressure
on the one that erects walls between us; that is their way of coping with life.
We
continue to love that person, and we meet them where they are, on their own
terms. However, we can also form other friendships that are more fulfilling for
us, and we ultimately look to God for that deep intimacy that we crave and need
in order to be fulfilled.
Prayer:
Father
God, we can relate to the fact that people are wounded by the events in their
childhood and early adulthood, and they are only able to love us in their own
way. We hope that these wounded people will eventually find healing for their soul
and love us completely; however, this may never happen. Help us to be satisfied
with that relationship by meeting them on their own level.
Yet,
also help us to find fulfilling relationships with people that are more willing
and able to be vulnerable and to choose to love us with our own love language. Teach
us that You are the true lover of our soul, and we come to You each moment of
the day for Your peace, joy, love and guidance. Teach us how to draw our real fulfillment
from our relationship with You.
Thought
for the Day:
We
live in harmony with others, accepting them as they are for who they are; but
we do not deprive our self of what we need, because we are a person too; and by
developing our intimate union with Christ in us, we allow His love to fill our
heart and to flow through us to the world around us.
