Over
the years, couples tend to drift apart. They take each other for granted and no longer feel connected. They are
more interested in their own pursuits and enjoyment than in mutual activities
that draw them closer. They stop appreciating each other and paying attention
to the details.
Physical
touch is an often neglected form of expressing love. It becomes a luxury, or a
hurried duty rather than a heart-felt practice. Holding hands, sitting next to
each other, snuggling, gazing into each other's eyes, a loving pat or hug, an
unexpected smooch, etc. assure us that we really care and cherish each other.
These
expressions of love need to be done every time we are together, rather than
once in a blue moon. In addition, when our mate comes to us to share an issue,
problem, concern or joyful experience, we owe them our undivided attention.
We
can mute the TV, take off our ear phones or buds, look him/her in the eye and
concentrate on his/her words, rather than the thoughts flitting through our
mind.
Busyness
gets in the way of our relationship with those people who care about us. Our
neglect may cause our mate to withdraw, to suffer from soul fatigue or
depression, to neglect us, or to harbor bitterness and anger in their soul.
Women
are accused of being complicated and impossible to please. The opposite is
actually true. Are you listening to her? Pay attention to her comments, even
those she makes in jest or in anger. Is she trying to get you to take her
seriously, and change your behavior toward her?
Men
need respect and admiration. They want a cheerleader for a mate, not a mother
figure or a nurse. They do not want someone to compete with, just someone they
have companionship with.
Men
often view a wife's questions as prying and a lack of trust, when they are
actually an attempt to show interest and to have an intimate conversation. She
wants to feel like part of your life - all of it, not just the obvious parts of
it.
Making
time for each other every day to snuggle and talk about our experiences,
insecurities, concerns, hopes and leadings from the Lord, etc. is vitally
important in order to stay intimately connected in a marriage.
Prayer:
Father
God, please remind us that apologizing for slights and mistakes will let our
mate know that we care about how our behavior affects him/her. They will not
think less of us for humbling our self in front of them. They will love and
respect us all the more, because our words are healing to their hurt feelings.
We
often doubt our own ability to keep our mate attracted to us - even those who
care about their appearance and make their home a haven into which we can
escape from the demands of the world. Remind us to pray together, and to find
Your solutions for our issues, as well as Your wisdom for the decisions that we
face.
Thought
for the Day:
When
we withhold information from one another, and fail to include our mate in what
we are thinking and feeling, he/she feels isolated and neglected; if our mate
senses that we are stressed or discouraged, they may take it personally when it
has nothing to do with them at all - the key is to communicate clearly.
