Taking our mate for granted is the first nail in the coffin of our marriage. During the dating phase of our relationship, we shower our girl/boyfriend with attention, special moments, long chats, and spending as much time with each other as is practical.
However, once the rings are exchanged, we have expectations based on our courtship that are no longer priorities to our mate. Frequent dating times slip from our list of main activities, and we spend more time watching our favorite TV shows, in our hobby rooms, or pursuing our own interests than each other.
Over time, we feel that we are married to a stranger that does not resemble the person we dated and chose as our lifelong mate. We are not nestled in that special place in each other’s heart like we were during our dating months/years. We even allow our self to flirt with other people rather than guarding that place in our heart only for each other.
However, that space in our life belongs to no one other than our spouse. We can redevelop our special love that we nurtured for each other during our dating days by making each other our main priority again. We can also focus on our mate’s strengths and use patience toward those issue that tend to frustrate, irritate, and anger us.
Concentrating on each other’s faults will discourage us and erect walls between us. Yet, focusing on what we love about one another will encourage loving behavior to continue and to grow along with our care and appreciation for our mate. As we guard each other’s feelings, we will keep one another as a priority in all our decisions.
Human beings change our priorities, interests, habits. and plans constantly throughout our life. However, as a couple, we need to make sure to choose those changes as we discuss them and make them together. When we do these few priorities, we realize how truly blessed we are to have our spouse as our lifetime partner.
Prayers:
Father God, help us to overlook our partner’s faults and instead to appreciate his/her strengths. Sometimes we are so intent on changing our mate to fit our lifestyle that we do not allow them to be equal partners on this road called life. Remind us not to belittle and look down on our mate, but to build him/her up and to appreciate all that they do for us.
Teach us to look to You for our fulfillment rather than to one another. We can work around each other’s schedules in order to care for many of our own needs, and to find our joy in our intimate relationship with You, and in Your eternal love for us. This love will then spill over into our relationship with our spouse. Thank You for Your constant presence in our life.
Thoughts for the Day:
Counselors advise us not to blame our mate for our emotional reactions to their words, behavior, and neglect of us. Our frustration, anger, irritation, discouragement, etc. are triggered by an unresolved issue in our own life. Many times, our attraction to our spouse we physical and our emotions crying out to be healed, so our emotional responses are not our mate’s fault, but our own responsibility to heal.
