When we truly love someone, we are willing to give up our faults in order to meld into one flesh. However, it is impossible to radically change one’s personality without the Holy Spirit interceding for us in the process of sanctification. We exchange our short comings for His fruit (Galatians 5:22-23).
We can change our self with His help, but we cannot change someone else. Therefore, an attitude of acceptance, or a change in our focus about their issue that bothers us, will help our unity and the longevity of our relationship. We can refocus on their strong points rather than allow their faults to bother us.
If our mate decides to adjust some aspect of their attitude or life, we can support them and encourage them as they make these changes. We can also change together – each one changing one aspect of our self that bothers the other, or changing the same behavior at the same time, such as dieting or exercising together.
We are never successful when we attempt to force our mate in a direction that we deem necessary for us. Accepting each other with all our faults, foibles, and idiosyncrasies without allowing irritation or resentment to overtake our thoughts and emotions, will do much to keep the peace in our relationship.
Our mate is not our private project to improve, but our loved one to be cherished. However, we can seriously discuss our individual needs and do our best to support one another. Compassion and patience toward our spouse will do as much to change us and our attitude as it does to improve our bond.
We are both human, and we can accept each other’s foibles and failings. Focusing on building our friendship and romantic moments will also build a firm foundation on which our marriage can stand. This will enable us to look forward to spending time together, and we will enjoy each other’s company.
Finding common interests, a ministry in which we serve together, a joint hobby, and making time to share in each other’s enjoyment, such as his ball game and her movies, will improve our harmony. We are all human and most of us do our best, so acceptance is a key issue for our union’s success.
Prayer:
Father God, thank You for the spouse you provided for us. Help us to cherish each other, to compromise rather than to fight, and to support one another’s needs, interests, and differences. Teach us to take photos of shared moments and milestones in our marriage and family, so we can peruse them together from time-to-time to reminisce about those common interests and happy moments.
Help us to value our shared history and not to take it lightly or to discard it in exchange for a new relationship. Remind us that You hate divorce because of the financial, mental, emotional, and physical trauma it causes us and our extended family. Teach us to value our union with our spouse, as well as our relationship with You. We want our marriage to mirror Jesus’ coming marriage to His bride (Ephesians 5:22-23).
Thoughts for the Day:
Our love will change over time as we adjust and accept one another, but we can keep our love fresh and renewed by playing, worshipping, exploring, and spending time together. Even a staycation is a time to focus on each other and to plan inexpensive but interesting events to experience together.
