Irritations,
hurt feelings, disrespect and being taken for granted, etc. are normal feelings
in any marriage. Two human beings bonded together in a covenant relationship,
or just as roommates, best friends, workmates, or church family will always
have rough patches that get on our nerves or hurt us.
It
is part of being human. None of us is perfect; we are all flawed people with
our own hang-ups and idiosyncrasies. Attempting to change one another is
futile. The best of us will try - very hard - to change, but we usually revert
back to our old irritating self. These are die-hard habits that are almost
impossible to change.
We
grow distant from each other, because we feel too vulnerable to share our true
feelings; or we sweep unresolved issues under the "rug," trying to
ignore them; or we put emotional, and sometimes even physical distance between
us and our spouse to protect our feelings, etc. Marriage takes patience and
diligence.
We
keep the channels of communication open between us by loving our spouse in
his/her "love language". Resolving issues pays huge dividends in our
relationship. Sometimes, we get too busy and take each other for granted. This
neglect is like a malignant cancer that spreads throughout our relationship.
When
we pay attention to our mate, we water the seeds of life between us and keep
our relationship fresh and growing. We find out how special our mate truly is,
and we support them in their endeavors to walk in the Spirit and to accomplish
God's will for their life.
Rewarding
our mate's attempts to love us with our own "love language" by praising
them and showing gratitude, rather than in complaints and rejection, encourages
them to continue to meet our needs in ways that truly bless us and increase the
flow of love between us.
Prayer:
Father
God, teach us how to make a continual search for ways to bless our spouse on a
daily basis. Help us not to ever take them for granted, but to thank them for
everything they do for us personally or for our common good - both great and
small. Remind us to participate in their interests, and to thank them for
taking an interest in what we enjoy.
Help
us to see the good in one another, rather than to focus on what we dislike.
Help us also to accept what we dislike as part of their personality and not to attempt
to change them. Remind us to ferret out potential problems that may be causing
stress in our relationship, and to resolve them together; because living with
pride, unforgiveness, bitterness and resentment are not healthy ways to live in
harmony. We trust You to give us a new love for one another with each sunrise.
Thought
for the Day:
When
we listen to intolerance about our spouse from extended family and friends, or
from the devil's temptation to disrupt our unity, we hurt our self as well as
our spouse by increasing our discontentment with our union; however, when we
look at one another through God's eyes, we start to appreciate His character
and divine nature in each other.
