The Southern
Baptist Convention has a special fund for Pastors and their wives who gave away
all of their earnings to the poor and to Kingdom causes; but then, ended up in
retirement with no money to pay their bills.
I not only
give to this ministry every year, but I also spent the bulk of my 60s saving
every penny that I could squeeze out of our budget in order to save for our
retirement years.
Eventually,
I had a good cushion in certificates of deposit that, along with social
security and a couple of IRAs, would see us through the first few years of
retirement.
I was also
counting on the sale of our Florida home to help us through another couple of
years; however, you know what they say, "the best laid plans of mice and
men."
Well, about
this same time, we met hurricane Irma of 2017, a record-breaking storm that
covered the entire state of Florida at one time and slowly moved up the middle
of the state wreaking havoc with every gust of wind and its torrential rain.
Although it
did not destroy our manufactured home like it did so many other places in our former
community, it did so much damage that I had to cash in our meager retirement
fund to pay for the labor and repairs.
At first, I
felt angry with God for not helping us to sell the place when we first
relocated to Illinois to serve as Pastor of the church where God sent us. He
also allowed the insurance to drop us since we were selling the home and no one
lived there.
In my
distress over the added financial stress this caused, I kept repeating Habakkuk 3:16-19 to keep my focus on God's faithfulness and to
release these negative feelings in my soul: "16 My inward parts trembled,
At the sound my lips quivered. Decay enters my bones, And in my place I
tremble. Because I must wait quietly for deliverance from the day of distress.
17 Though the fig tree should not blossom And there be
no fruit on the vines, Though the yield of the olive should fail And the fields
produce no food, Though the flock should be cut off from the fold And there be
no cattle in the stalls,
18 YET I will exult in the LORD, I will rejoice in the
God of my salvation. 19The LORD GOD is my strength, And He has made my feet
like hinds' feet, And makes me walk on my high places."
Then, God
led me to read a devotion posted by a fellow Pastor and it brought about the
needed conviction in my soul to help me to repent and move on.
I realized
that I was more concerned about saving for our future than I was about trusting
God to provide our daily bread (Matthew 6:11). I placed my confidence in our
meager savings, rather than in our God who owns the cattle on a thousand hills
(Psalm 50:10).
Prayer:
Father God,
I repent of my self-centered notion that I could provide for our needs better
than You can. Saving money became an idol in my life, which I trusted in to
care for us more than I trusted You. I know that saving is important, but I had
my priorities in the wrong place. Now, I verbally, mentally and emotionally
place our care in Your capable hands, because You always care for us (1 Peter
5:7).
I trusted
You all of my life to protect, nurture and provide for me and everyone that I
love. Now, I put our retirement years in Your loving hands too (Hebrews 13:5).
I will trust in You to continue to supply our daily needs with Your glorious
riches (Philippians 4:19). I stop striving for this and I go back to trusting
in Your benevolence and watch care over us every moment of every day.
Thought for
the Day:
In this
world, we encounter so much tribulation that it is easy to fall into the trap
of worrying about tomorrow; yet, Jesus exhorted us to seek His Kingdom first
and to allow tomorrow to worry about itself. Living in the moment with
gratitude in our heart to the Lord is where we will find true serenity and joy.
- Matthew 6:34-35; Proverbs 3:5-6
