Our
words both tear down or build up. Affirmation is so important to a human being,
because demeaning and verbally attacking each other causes us to doubt our
worth, to withdraw, to become bitter, and to stop meeting one another's needs.
Hearing
negative words from our mate tears us down, belittles us, and makes us feel
"less than." Condescension also affects our spiritual life, faith,
and vocation, as well as our emotional health. This disapproving behavior drives
a wedge between us.
Conversely,
affirmation given in every possible circumstance, both in public and in
private, will help to build up one another personally and as a couple. We
encourage and sustain each other throughout the day with texts, emails, phone
calls and little notes tucked away in obvious places.
This
increases our mate's feelings of intimacy as well as decreases his/her
vulnerability and sensitivity. We listen attentively and take an active
interest in what interests one another. This lets us know that we are valued,
cherished and desirable.
We
can agree to disagree rather than to argue; we look for ways to compromise,
rather than to insist on our own way; we tell each other what we like about one
another instead of pointing out faults or what irritates us; and we help each
other when we get behind on our chores rather than to complain.
Encouragement
and affirmation strengthen us to face the belittlement we receive from the
world around us. We pray with and for one another daily. We serve God together
as a couple and with our family; as well as individually in our daily life,
vocation and church ministries.
Frequently
communicating with each other the positive feelings that we have for one
another endears us to our mate. We value, admire, and are proud of each other's
Godly character. Our compliments cause one another's smile to beam like the
sun, and we face life with joy in our hearts.
Prayer:
Father
God, remind us to change our focus rather than to dwell on the negative aspects
of our mate's faults, attitude, habits, hobbies and idiosyncrasies. Help us to
see things from their perspective, so we can understand their reactions to us
and to life in general. Exhort us to see each other as a friend, not as a foe;
and to treat each other as we expect to be treated.
Help
us to pour out praise, compliments and appreciation to each other rather than
criticism, sarcasm and finding faults. Teach us to cherish our relationship and
one another, to love each other unconditionally as You love us, and to work
together in a ministry that impacts our world for Your Kingdom. We live to
bring You praise and glory with our life.
Though
for the Day:
Pointing
out the good that we see in our mate is a beneficial habit we can all cultivate
- praise more and criticize less; and we find ways to compliment integrity,
hard work, faithfulness, loyalty, selflessness, humility, diligence, and a job
well done, so that we flourish in the light of positive affirmation.
