People do not need to agree with us for us to be “right.” What we believe may not be right for them, but that does not mean it is not right for us. We never need to follow the “mob” mentality in order to feel like we are making a good decision for our self. If someone disagrees with us – even a parent or spouse or child – it does not indicate that we are wrong.
It just suggests that we have different goals, ideals, life view, etc. than they do. We can stand on our own two feet, let the other person make their choice and then make choices of our own that are best for us. Even in marriage, we do not need to be in sync through every choice or decision.
Codependency, laying down like a doormat, or giving up on our hopes, dreams, and needs all the time is not a necessity. We can go our separate ways, at times, and come back together to be united in other decisions. Praying about God’s will in all our decisions keeps us united, and it brings ultimate peace to our relationship.
I think the best way as a couple is to find a third option on which we can both agree. That may not always be possible, but it is usually probable if we bathe the decision in prayer. God has perfect plans for both of us. He may want to use us together, but He may choose to use us in two separate venues for a while too.
We can go with the flow of His Holy Spirit and support one another in our separate ministries and choices. This does not diminish our love for one another, but it does prevent us from feeling used, belittled, limited, or like we do not matter. We always matter to God, and He proves this in a myriad of ways that fill our soul with His love and joy.
The next time we have a conflict with someone, we can pray together and attempt to hear God’s direction for a third choice for this decision that we can both agree on; and then, go with God’s direction, even if it means that we go our separate ways with a significant friend or family member or spouse for a short time.
Prayer:
Father God, give us the courage to make choices that keep us in the center of Your will for us. Help us to support one another in these decisions in order to stay within Your perfect will for both of us. We want all that we say, feel, and do to bring honor and glory to Your name as we further Your Kingdom on the earth.
You have perfect choices for us to make that You ordained before You ever formed us in our mother’s womb. We want to walk in the center of Your will – the happiest place on earth for us. This prevents negative attitudes and emotions from coming between us and the significant others in our life, and gives us the peace, joy and fulfillment that resting in You provides for us.
Thought for the Day:
Limiting our choices to do only what other people feel is right for us is never the right option, because following God’s will and purpose for each of us is always the right choice; our marriage is enhanced by making sure that we both have God’s perfect peace about decisions that we make individually and as a couple.
